“Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
— Bernard Baruch
“I have nothing to prove”, is my motto for 2024. Every moment I notice I am experiencing unworthiness, competition, jealousy, anxiety, judgment, or pressure to be anything other than who I am right in that moment, I am choosing to repeat to myself, “I have nothing to prove”. How powerful is that? I have nothing to prove!
My plan is this: When I feel the need to stretch myself beyond my limits, say yes when I want to say no, override one of my own boundaries, or when I am cutting myself down, I will bring in this powerful phrase.
Everything that must be proved through my soul expression already proved by my existence alone. Just by being alive, my soul has proved itself, and so has yours. Everything else that comes after is just a choose your own adventure, with mini-missions from your highest self, which you are supported in by your guides and teams.
As we grow and evolve, we change. For better or worse, we just do. That being said, it is not a BAD thing when we quit our jobs that we have outgrown, let go of old hobbies and start new ones, or leave relationships. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with us or that anything is wrong with the job, hobby, or friend/lover. The toxicity and issues begin to arrive when we outgrow these aspects of our life and continue to cling to them.
If we hear the intuition to leave or let go, or to start something new, and we don’t follow it, sometimes the universe hits us over the head with a brick so we can hurry the f*** up and get back to being our best selves.
Letting go of old narratives or situations is often one of the HARDEST things we will ever do. It can be so painful, raw, and scary. We want to prove that we can make it work, or that we are enough, or we think that our worth is found in the job, hobby, or relationship.
When we truly know our inner worth, we can let go of these things without fear. It doesn’t mean it won’t still hurt or be hard, but when we do, we are rewarded ten-fold.
If we can gently remind ourselves that we have nothing to prove, and our only job is to show up the best that we can and then let go, forgive, and move on, then we navigate these hard moments with much more grace and ease, because we aren’t gripping so tightly.
These opportunities to acknowledge our worth show up in the big, life-changing moments, but also the small, day to day decisions:
For example:
- If I want to be super social and talkative out in public one day, and the next I want to spend the day focused on the internal landscape, quiet and alone, I can follow these urges without worrying about what people think because I have nothing to prove.
- If I want to dress cute and eat a salad one day, and the next day I want to dress sloppy-cozy and eat Taco Bell, I can go for it without shame or anxiety because I have nothing to prove.
- If I start something and halfway through am called to quit, I am allowed to. I have nothing to prove.
- If I want to show up on social media consistently one week, and take a complete social media break the next week, I can do both and feel *good* about it if that is what lights me up and calls to me. I have nothing to prove.
- If I want to put out a blog that is less than perfect and share my deepest secrets, OR if I want to keep things for myself only until they are more fully processed and take a break from writing, either of those things could be my highest path for that moment. I have nothing to prove.
You get the idea.
The people who truly love us will continue to love us, perhaps even more deeply, as we show up in the most authentic way possible.
Ask Yourself:
- How do you currently try to prove yourself in your life, to yourself or to others?
- What of these aspects could you perhaps lay down, or let go of?
- What is something you’ve always wanted to do (that’s accessible for you) that you have never done, and why?
- Where are you holding yourself back because you are trying to stay true to an old narrative or be what someone expects of you?
- Where could you more fully express yourself, or give yourself space to grow and change?
Action Item:
Catch yourself in a moment today where “I have nothing to prove” applies, and give yourself the space and grace you deserve.
Resource: My Human Design